We KNOW our beliefs are logical, rational, and — above all — correct, therefore we should be able to educate others. Once someone is committed to their beliefs, confirmation bias makes it nearly impossible to change minds. This has been a season of arguing. I applaud everyone who stands up for their beliefs, and I am even MORE in awe of those who allow themselves to engage, learn, and possibly even have their minds changed by conversation.
But with much of our conversations today being held in virtual forums like social media, the likelihood of mind-changing seems low. Save your precious energy for your loved ones, keep your conflicts productive, and try to find honest-to-goodness connection in as many places as you can.
Eventually a woman in the line simply drew a boundary. We all followed her lead and, eventually, he went to the back of the line. Arguments: 0. Boundaries: 1. When I went online to pay the parking fine, I tried to dispute the ticket. I thought I had a good case so I argued and, a few weeks later, lost the case. You have 1 free article s left this month. You are reading your last free article for this month. Subscribe for unlimited access. Create an account to read 2 more.
Business communication. I […] by Peter Bregman. Read more on Business communication or related topic Difficult conversations. Peter Bregman is the CEO of Bregman Partners , a company that helps successful people become better leaders, create more effective teams, and inspire their organizations to produce great results. Best-selling author of 18 Minutes , his most recent book is Leading with Emotional Courage. I like to keep my wits sharp. To do this, I often listen to debates on my computer while performing mundane tasks at work.
The debates cover every issue you can imagine; immigration policy, foreign affairs, education, you name it. As you might expect, there are experts on both sides of the issue armed with reams of documents. As you also might expect, neither side gives an inch. No matter what either side says, the other team remains cemented to the notion that the opposing team is mis-informed, ill-intentioned, or outright evil. This particular program polls the audience prior to the debate, and then again afterwards.
The winner is not the team with the highest number of followers among the audience, but the team that changed the most minds. As in our two-party political system, there are people on both sides of each issue, and there is a percentage of undecided voters. In politics, most strategists acknowledge that there is little chance of converting a Republican to a Democrat, and vice versa; they focus on the independent voters.
And indeed, when the results are displayed at the end of the debate, I am pleasantly surprised as to how many people began the debate voting for one side, yet changed their vote based on what they learned. How does this relate to business?
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